Gwyneth Paltrow throws out boobs during phone sex with Joaquin Phoenix

Yes, we knew it! Gwyneth Paltrow is not the fake British tight-ass she pretends to be. Deep down she’s just a little American porn star who always dreamt of making erotic films. And in Two Lovers she got the chance to flash her nipples and much more at Joaquin Phoenix. Mind you, that was back when Joaquin was sane, wasn’t sporting the smelly homeless madman look and wasn’t attempting to sing rap. In Two Lovers, Gwyneth is Michelle, the naughty neighbor of a depressed loser named Leonard (Joaquin) who lives with his parents after breaking up with long-term partner. While Leonard’s parents are attempting to fix him up, Leonard is quickly seduced by Michelle who enjoys getting off by having phone sex with him.

Unfortunately the movie will be out in March…and that depresses us because it’s still January. We’ll take a 5-minute break now…erh, we have to make an important phone call.