Lindsay Lohan wants to become a Jew for Samantha

Lindsay Lohan wants to prove she’s a true lesbian deeply devoted to her lesbian lover and the only way to do so is to become a Jew. Because, although she was raised to be a devout Catholic, she knows God won’t mind her switching religions if it is for the quest of true love.

And so, while in London, she visited a synagogue to try and breath in the mysterious beauty of Judaism(the lessons at the London synagogue must have been tiresome because right after, Lindsay and Sam refuelled by doing some serious shopping on Chelsea’s King’s Road).

Mind you, Lindsay, ever the restless soul also tried Scientology and Kaballah, but the love affair lasted as long as one of her booze drinking sessions.

And if you’re wondering what her father Michael, who recently also discovered the virtues of faith and is now a full-working minister thinks, he’s just happy she’s involving God in her life.

Dude, God has nothing to do with this. Your daughter did too much partying with bisexual Lily Allen, Sam got pissed, and now she’s just trying to get herself out of the dog house. Period.