Seriously, LAPD should be stricter with hookers walking in stores with their work uniforms

Shauna Sand went nuts when she heard they were having a 50% off at the Shoes for Stars (where she always shops because she’s a star herself) on Melrose Ave.

But Shauna is not very good at visualizing how well a shoe will go with a certain outfit (hence why she always walks around with clear stipper platforms, even at the beach – clear is not a color so it will go with anything right?). So what a better way to not waste her last 15 bucks on a bad purchase than to bring with, her work costumes and try them on with each shoe pair.

Because we moonlighted as stylists for Lady Gaga, Carrotop and Sher, we will tell you what to buy. Those 30 inch boots (preferably like you wore them in the store, one red and one silver) would be fabulous with the wire mesh you wrapped yourself with. And don’t worry about falling down (which will happen the minute you walk toward the first customer holding a fiver inbetween his fingers). We hear the mesh is strong enough to prevent any silicone rupture…now the nipple chafing, that’s something we won’t guarantee.

And a word to Vivid Entertainmet: please take this girl off the streets, it’s too dangerous for her safety. She’s more than ready for one of your quality movies (hey, maybe she can do one together with octomum)…just make sure your benefits package includes health insurance.