No, Larry David did not sneek out of the house to go visit hookers…he didn’t cheat with a co-worker…he didn’t even leave the toilet seat up…all he did was floss…and that was too much to take for his wife, so she divorced him.
He explains to OK Magazine, “It started to go downhill when I started to go on a health craze. I started eating very healthy foods and she hated that. I just thought she wanted me to die! So that was a contributing factor, she really didn’t like that.
“The other thing was, I’m obsessed with oral hygiene. I floss constantly and she was really getting quite tired of it. I would floss in front of her and she’d be like, ‘Don’t floss in front of me anymore.’ I was like, ‘Oh, OK.’ And I’m like, ‘Tongue scraping, would that be OK?’ Then we went out for dinner, she went to the bathroom and I tried to sneak a floss in. She caught me mid-floss. And that was it.”
Poor Larry. He didn’t realize his wife was itching to get rid of him (and probably get to the business of refreshing and antibactirializing some young stud’s mouth with her tongue) and because he was so squeaky clean (pardon the pun) she couldn’t find any other reason…so she attacked the floss with a vengeance…
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