Here’s Serena Williams attempting to bring all penises to the breaking point because, instead of being perched on top of the Empire State building, grabbing traffic helicopters with her toes she’s oiled up and naked on the cover of ESPN’s first Body Issue (to hit stands on October 9). And since staring at her privates would feel similar to actually seeing the Lochness monster for the first time, the editors made sure her Grand Canyon was strategically covered.
Serena is among six athletes who have been chosen to appear on six different covers of the magazine. The other five sport figures include mixed martial artist Gina Carano, NASCAR driver Carl Edwards, triathlete Sarah Reinertsen, Minnesota Vikings’ running back Adrian Peterson, and Dwight Howard of the NBA’s Orlando Magic.
The editor-in-chief of ESPN The Magazine, Gary Belsky, said the magazine will also include a section called “Bodies We Want” that features other top athletes, who either pose in the buff or with minimal clothing. He stated at a conference call on Wednesday, September 30 that the section is “essentially our version of the best bodies in sports.”
Mercifully, King Kong did not make that section. And for those who’s memory is as weak as Hugh Hefner’s bladder, here’s a few pics to remind you why Serena Williams naked and untouched is a blatant violation of penis human rights.
October 7, 2009 at 6:20 am
She will cram f@(%ing balls down your F@#^ing throat! First she’ll break your racket.
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October 7, 2009 at 7:09 am
She is verbally and physically disgusting. Unfortunately she can’t win. Her father is in her gene pool
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October 7, 2009 at 6:15 pm
did you just call her a monkey?
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October 7, 2009 at 6:33 pm
1st, i take offense to the monkey joke, and 2nd, i believe Serena is very attractive…ESPECIALLY THAT ASS! I wish i was on the beach with her! Not only would I marry her, but i would fu@k her so often that I would run out of sperm in two years!Fu@k that fake ESPN photo and to hell with your criticisms.
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October 7, 2009 at 8:49 pm
what’s with the racism? you fucking cowards would never say this to her face
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October 7, 2009 at 9:49 pm
Technically, she’s not a monkey. King Kong was an ape.
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October 7, 2009 at 10:18 pm
Sufferin’ Jayzuz! She looks like the cover girl on an old copy of R.Crumb’s “Big Ass” comics
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