Brad Pitt pretends to be 'Wired'

Brad Pitt is on the August cover of Wired Magazine proving he is ‘hip’ and ‘with it’ and ‘down with the blue tooth.’  The 45-year-old digital gentleman spends some time giving out his best technology-related advice.  Here are some of the gems he shared:

On his thoughts of tweeting a picture of his wife’s butt like Ashton Kutcher did of Demi Moore: “Don’t take a picture of your wife’s butt. That’s silly. Take pictures of other people’s wives’ butts.”

On lying about how much money you make on your online dating profile: “Everyone lies online. In fact, readers expect you to lie. If you don’t, they’ll think you make less than you actually do. So the only way to tell the truth is to lie.”

On talking on the phone while taking a whiz: “No, you can’t talk on the phone! Do you want the guy next to you to hear your entire conversation? That’s why you should only text in the bathroom. Just be sure you don’t hit the wrong button and end up putting a photo of your junk on Twitter. Trust me, you don’t want those followers.”

On sometimes awkward cyber dilemmas: “Who cares if your Warcraft wife is really a dude. If it’s good, don’t check under the hood.” (Warcraft is a massively multiplayer online video game.)

Look, we don’t believe for one second that Brad tweets or understands anything about the homoerotic undertones that neckbeards willingly accept if they play WoW.  We do however like the cut of his jib on that first question and encourage everyone to take pictures of their friend’s wives’ butts.  But don’t upload them to your Twitter account where only 31 of your lame followers can see.  Send them to us instead – we’ll make sure they get passed around!