Heidi Klum and her swollen ankles have a Snack Deluxe "fur alle"

We are to believe ofcourse, that when Heidi Klum gets those midnight cravings, she screams at Seal to put his pyjamas on and run to the nearest McDonald’s to get her a Double Snack Deluxe and a Jumbo coke…that’s probably her secret to maintaining her figure after a dozen pregnancies…because those burgers are practically calorie-free, right?

And because this promotion was in Munich, and the Germans are kinky blue-eyed freaks, the burgers were wrapped as previous  gifts coming out of a heart (because they are a great way to clog your heart arteries in a jiffy) and were then squashed and mushed by an overjoyed Heidi (it’s the hormones).

We will try to forgive her for trying to pass junk food as a healthy snack…afterall she needs to feed her growing family and Seal’s music, Project Runway, Germany’s Next Top Model, her jewellery line and her Victoria’s Secret gig hardly pay for the diapers and rash creams…