Kim Kardashian Pleaded With God to Stop Her Breasts from Growing, and God Laughed

And no, “God”  was not her pet name for her plastic surgeon. Her boobs have always been real, we never had any doubts about that, her face, personality, and soul, are completely 100% fake though.

Kim recently talked to Popeater where she had this heartfelt story about the grief of being titty bullied…

Kourtney used to torture me and think I was odd because I had big boobs. I was 11 when I got my period and I started developing. I would sit in the bathtub, take a washcloth, put it under really hot water and put it against my boobs and pray to God, please don’t make my boobs grow any bigger. And Kourtney would be like, “Your boobs are so big and ugly!” She was so mean and then I would have to wear a bra and she would say, “Who wears a bra? That’s so disgusting.” It was so embarrassing.

Wait, so, in this story the only person who teased her was her sister? That shit doesn’t count as teasing, that’s what older siblings are for. Besides isn’t it kind of weird to tease your sister about her boobs? Wouldn’t this be the equivalent of teasing your brother because he has a big dick? Heck, my brother has a massive dick and I never teased him about it. He used to walk around the house slapping me around the face with it but I showed him nothing but the utmost respect.

I am assuming all of this must have been before the family realized the value of big tits and fucking guys on tape for popularity.