Looks Like We Might Be Getting a Jersey Shore Sex Tape
Oh orange colored joy! Rumors are swirling that there may be a Jersey Shore sex tape starring Ronnie and Sammi. Reportedly, Ronnie Ortiz-Magro and Sammi Sweetheart Giancola (who must be some sub-species of Jersey Shore because this is the first I’ve heard of them) made a sextape and then lost it.
Fortunately, we all know how this shit works: It will be “discovered” by Radar Online later this month, and then released by Vivid Entertainment. Then everyone will make lots of money, while we get stuck with the horrific consequences of having to watch two of the world’s biggest morons get naked and paw at each other.
So watch out for the Jersey Shore Ronni and Sammi sex tape any day now. Maybe this one will be everything we’ve been hoping for. But we highly doubt it will be anything more than a disgustingly greasy Guido love fest with too much orange fake-tan and a mountain of steroids.