Did you know?

I came across some interesting “facts” that I wanted to share with you all.  I say “facts” in quotes because you can’t believe everything you read on the internet. – Abraham Lincoln

Did you know you can pinch the skin on your elbow with your fingers and it will not hurt?  Interesting, because if you cut yourself there, it hurts. I know because as a child I had many elbow boo-boos.

Did you know if you eat enough carrots you will actually turn orange? This is absolutely true, however I don’t know for sure because I don’t like carrots enough to test this theory. I definitely don’t like carrots enough to actually, physically turn orange.

Did you know that fried worms reportedly taste like bacon? No and I never will.

Did you know the ‘G’ in ‘G-string’ stands for groin?  I thought it stood for, ” Gawd Daaaaayum!!!”

Did you know the opposite side of a dice cube always adds up to seven? You have too much time on your hands my friend, but now that I know,  I think this is totally an awesome fact and look forward to sharing this with everyone I come across.

Did you know there aren’t any clocks in Las Vegas casinos?  Because in Vegas, win or lose, nobody gives a ‘cha-ching’ what time it is.

Did you know that the aphrodisiac ‘Spanish Fly’ is made from dried beetle sh*t? I’m sure my exes have put much worse into their bodies.

Did you know the chances of you dying on the way to get your Super Lotto tickets is greater than your chances of winning?  The way that I live, that means my chances are pretty good.

Did you know McDonald’s is the largest distributor of toys? McDonald’s can suck my McD!ck.

Did you know the plastic tip on your shoe laces is called an ‘aglet’?  Cool, now when I see one missing,  I can be like, “Dude, you’re missing your aglet.”

Did you know according to U.S. FDA standards, 1 cup of orange juice is allowed to contain 10 fruit fly eggs, but only 2 maggots?  You should see what the FDA allows in Ketchup…Ranch Dressing is now the condiment of choice. I’m sure the FDA also allows things into ranch, but I haven’t Googled that, so I’m good.

Did you know sex can unblock a stuffy nose? Sex is a natural antihistimine. Atleast this is what I tell my asthmatic wife.

Did you know that there are enough people in the world who enjoy the sensation of insects crawling on their genitals that they have a name for it?  ‘Formicophilia’.  I believe this one. Who would make up this kind of sh*t?

Did you know that there is a ‘Superman’ somewhere in every episode of Seinfeld?  Did you know there was a Superman inside Wonder Woman when they were dating?

Did you know that a ducks quack won’t echo?  The next time I happen to be standing in a cave with a duck, I’ll let you know.

Did you know that in your lifetime you will have eaten about 70 assorted insects and spiders?  This is precisely why I sleep with a ski mask. Plus if I ever have a burglar they will see me and just leave because they will think that I’m already on the job. It’s some sorta burglar code.

Did you know you can’t lick your elbows? Did you also know you can’t lick your own nipples? Unless you have a C cup and above to maybe a DD…I’m not sure.  I need some girls that fall within those lines to come experiment with me. Scientific research.

Did you know a person can live without food for about a month, but only about a week without water?  I’ve seen Castaway with the voice of Woody from Toy Story, I knew this one.

Did you know that the Guinness Book of Records holds the record for  being the book most often stolen from Public Libraries? Public Libraries still exists???