Russell Brand (here with Katy Perky Boobs at the John Galliano fashion show in Paris) wants everyone to know that he is the bickest dick in comedy…that or he wants Katy Perry to feel she’s dating a very romantic penis. Because Russell is planning to get the chorus of Morrissey’s 1995 B-side Whatever Happens, I Love You (said to also be Katy’s favorite song) tattooed on it…which is pretty much impossible unless he’s inherited the penis of T-Rex.

Here’s the lyrics:”Cold loving prose, we stole each other’s clothes/ But when all is said and done, it’s you I love.”

On the other hand, if this holds any water, then Russell Brand is the smartest man on the planet…because he just found a way to make giving a BJ feel like going to the theatre to watch Romeo And Juliet…genious.

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