SPL157835_001We all knew Spencer Pratt was a turd stuck to Heidi’s remodeled ass, but it turns out he’s also entirely delusional because he’s refusing to accept the fact that he’s married to 1/3 polymer, 1/3 silicone and 1/3 human flesh. “Hey honey, someone named Mattel called and they said they need you back for some adjustments? Who the hell are these people? Now can we go back to you poking me in the face with your penises, er, jugs?”

To explain, it all started when Audrina Patridge went on Lopez Tonight and spoke about Heidi’s plastic surgery.

“She got her child chiseled, her nose done again, her cheeks, boobs redone, lipo, butt job, I don’t know ten procedures…in one day…it’s a lot,”  she told host George Lopez.

And that’s when Spenc fired up a Twitter shitstorm up Audrina’s way:

“I would like to make it CLEAR! My wife and audrina have severed all ties! We no longer deal with that fake world and fake people like her.”

“Audrina – Don’t hate because your nasty Tijuana plastic surgery got you no press.”

“Who elected you to gage cool – BITCH! Why don’t u and ur played out 90s singer Cabrera go into a bathroom stall and do what u do best…”

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