When you first meet someone that you have a romantic interest in, it can be so intense that it defies logic. You do crazy things together that you would never consider on your own. Neither would they. For some reason when you’re together, you make a lethal combination of danger, anger and desire. You can’t believe the things you are doing and how someone else convinced you to do it. The activities are enticing for awhile. You love the constant long nights of no sleep and passionate sex. The crazy adventures never end, unfortunately the rest of your life is falling apart around you. Sometimes there are arguments where the entire house gets tore apart.
How Can Being Happy Turn Toxic?
This kind of relationship is fueled on adrenaline. Although it is fun, It can turn toxic at anytime without warning. Something can set one of you off and your off to the races. You are getting along and having a great time, then the disagreements begin which turn loud within minutes. He heard this and she heard that. One of you grabs the other’s phone and start going through the history. A phone call could be from a telemarketer and you get accused of cheating. You are accusing each other of outlandish behavior and sexual escapades with other partners. Neither of you can maintain your composure and the verbal abuse of intense name calling and accusations escalates to objects being thrown and broken. You almost hit the other person and start to feel guilty and begin to sob and apologize. Your partner does the same and you end up in bed, making love like nothing happened. It would seem that the adrenaline of the intense arguing is an aphrodisiac. This type of relationship is toxic and unhealthy. It will never last and if it does, someone will end up getting seriously hurt or killed in the process. Unfortunately the dynamics once set in a relationship are hard to change.
Why Would Anyone Want to Deal With This?
A toxic relationship can become addictive. The people in the relationship quickly confuse lust and obsession with real love. They begin to say “She gets angry because she loves me so much.” “He went through my call history because he cares.” These relationships have nothing to do with love at all, but the intense feelings frequently become confused as such. Ending one is hard because of all the mixed emotions that go on inside of the relationship. “We wouldn’t argue like this if we didn’t love each other” or “the sex is amazing” frequently becomes the mantras of the toxic relationship addict.
Life After a Toxic Relationship
Getting involved in a new relationship after a toxic one, can bring along a lot of emotional baggage. A person who has never been in a toxic relationship or has been and won’t do it again has to be patient in order for it to work out. They will have the urge to run quickly if the other person attempts some of his previous behaviors. It is unselfish without ulterior motives to trick the other person or benefit yourself in some way. A toxic relationship can ruin someone from understanding when a normal person really cares for them because they don’t react with extreme anger every time they go out or talk to someone of the opposite sex. It can be very confusing to them when someone is continuously nice without expecting anything in return. People can change however and being patient with this victim and perpetrator of emotional abuse can help heal the previous wounds and live a happy life with someone else.